A Nuyorican Vision - Thoughts in Motion

This entire week I have been sick. Sick enough that my appetite had completely disappeared. Now, I know I complain about losing weight but not eating is not the way I want to lose it. During this time, if I was not trying to get some work done or sleeping I had time to think. I realized I am tired of being alone.

I started reminiscing about my marriage. Yes, my marriage had problems but one thing I know, my hubby and I were friends. You know the type, we fought but we could not be separated for long. And long for us that was approximately 15 minutes tops! We geniunely like being around each other. He was my best friend and I miss him so much.

During my sickness I realized that I missed that closeness of knowing that someone really cares about you. Now, yes, my parents are still alive but with their active social life, there are times when unfortunately they forget about me. I spent two days not eating and throwing up. No one knew. My friends called and left messages but there was no one here physically who cared. I must admit I am no picnic in the park but the fact that I have no one really saddens me. It dawned on me yesterday that the one person who really cared, really loved me died a long time ago. I am alone.