A Nuyorican Vision - Thoughts in Motion

So being a bit intoxicated today, I decided to share a few secrets. This post may or may not survive. You have been warned.

The truth is that I am tired of the rat race. I have been tired since 2000. Somehow my priorities changed. Being successful in Corporate America no longer appealed to me. I was very successful in the financial company I was working at in 2000. But I decided that I no longer wanted to manage the 40 people I was responsibile for nor did I want to become SVP. I was a VP at the time and my manager had told me a month before I quit that I was being promoted to SVP. What did I do? I left to become an underpaid consultant in my old company. I was a consultant for 5 years there. Underpaid and overworked. When I was hired, my salary was increased to almost 20% of the current salary. I decided to move to another group after considering heavily that I will finally happy. The truth is...I changed. I don't know when it happened but no longer did money or status appeal to me. I got older and friends and family became more important. I kept telling myself that I was just burnt out. The truth is my priorities just changed. I starting viewing Corporate America success as a deal with the devil. I continued to pump myself up but I couldn't. I kept this a secret from friends and family. After all, isn't the goal to achieve the American dream?

So next week I will turn 41. And after thinking deeply on the subject, the truth is I just want two rugrats, an old fashion home and a Volkswagon Bettle. So much for the American dream. Everyone I know expects me to bounce back from this pending layoff and land on my feet. The truth is I no longer want to work but need money in order to live. I really don't know what I want to do.

Am I going through a mid-life crisis?

Update: Someone read this post and wrote a post about it in their website: http://in-spiros.com/artofallowingmindset/?p=18. Check it out.